Oct. 2, 2010 (Bidadi) Just wanted to share a small incident that happened recently in the Bidadi Ashram.
Actually, beside our regular tasks in the ashram, there was an initiative from one of the senior Maharaj, he decided to help the brahmacharis and brahmacarinis to internalize Swami's teachings.
One of the way is to have a very short discussion or forum. This is whenever we are chatting while waiting for the meeting to start or in the dining room chit-chatting while eating, he suggested we will start talking about Swami or His teachings. Even if it's just for 5 minutes. He said the whole problem with our mission is because we never internalize Swami's words and no depth in understanding about the mission . (again these are my words, can't remember exact words he used).
Another thing that he suggested was to do a thorough research and study of a favorite topic or a something relevant to our service in the mission. This he said "do a presentation". He said like presentation in the colleges. Then he went around asking for topics voluntarily. Here you go, I raised my hand and suggested "being in the presence of the Master". The rational behind that topic was I truly believe there will be a huge transformation being in the presence of the Living Master but I always had difficulty to put it in words when my friends talk to me on this subject in a debating or argumentative way. And on top of it now my seva (volunteering service) is doing the Healing Tower work, sharing my spiritual experience.
If I am given the power to decide for all my friends and family (of course family in a big picture, all the devotees) I will bring all of them to this up coming Inner Awakening Program, so they can be in the physical presence of the Master, especially now He is out after a major abusal from the society and being in the seclusion for 53 days. One should be in His presence, then they will understand what are they missing. They may not know now right away, but I tell you from my experience, this will allow Swamiji to give birth to a 'NEW YOU'. Oh God.... I just wish everybody could see the importance of it. Anyway based on this, I thought if I internalize it, I will be able to express and verbalize it better, so it will benefit others and myself.
Now, came my turn and I said out loud the topic 'Being in the Presence of the Master'. Maharaj looked at me, the very next second, he said "Ma...you have deeper experience, come-up with some other topic'. I think He gave that topic to some other bramacharinis. Oh no...!
Here you go, next 15 minutes, I was thinking all different type of topics. In fact I told Maharaj, "something deeper???" laughingly I said "should I talk about societies' abuses to be a spiritual seeker". We laughed and he said, 'no, you don't have to talk about that'. I raised my hand again, told him "Why don't you suggest a topic for me." He said "I've been thinking, but nothing is falling in place yet". In matter of minutes he said he thought of a topic for me.
Can you Guess???? He said .......
Honestly my first reaction was..................to Cry. It was like arrows of words hit me. Really, after that whole time I was in the meeting, whenever I think about this title.....felt like crying.
Somehow, I felt like, it was a painful experience. I really wondered based on what did he pick that title for me.
The title is "TRUST even if you are Exploited"
Recently, I went through a divorce. The divorce happened in such an 'ugly' and painful way ( that was my experience). Some how I felt strongly, I lived Master's teachings the whole time 'Trusted and trusted and trusted.....'. Each time.....I gave my trust, I received as a return exploitation." Just by one person. Truly, that was my experience and feeling. Whether it's my ego or imagination or truth................that's is the strong experience I went through my divorce.
Never, I understood the concept of 'trust even if you are exploited'. When first time I heard from Swamiji, I wondered....'how can you trust someone, when you are exploited'?. I remember Swami was referring to Ma Sarada Devi's life.
God....I must have either picked up from Swamiji or He must have 'installed' that 'software' or His bio-memory in me, to trust someone, to live life with trust. Honestly.....if you know my story of divorce, I am pretty sure you will agree with me, that my trust was exploited each time. However as mentioned in Swami's teaching, when you trust even when we are exploited, we do live like a king. It doesn't make sense, but this is like spirituality....it's beyond logic. Again I am stuck, not able to verbalize.
However the good news is one of my dear friends, with whom I've shared most of my personal life story especially the journey I went through while divorcing and my life after that, put my experience of 'TRUST even if you are exploited' in writing, with the idea to help me to present the topic relating it with my personal life story and end with Master's teachings.
I did promise to some of you, I will email that content.....still not comfortable to share it up in the web publicly. But I am willing to share, just email me....if I know you, I will share it with you.
Here you go.......................my sharing for today.
Friday, October 1, 2010
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Inner Healing
Sept. 29, 2010 (Bidadi)
Inner Healing with four senior Swamis. Many issues were addressed, stories shared, questions answered. It was held in Bidadi ashram yesterday. Originally planned for an hour but it was too much fun & open sharing, it went on almost for 2 hours.
Some questions I remember, why sharing your experience is given so much importance?, is sanyas needed for enlightenment?, 53 days in the prison with Swamiji what is one highlight or something you would say? (I forgot the exact question, but something close to this).
1) Sharing (this was referred to sharing through Healing Towers or facebook or share it with family and friends). Every sanyasis shared their view but one that I still remember is by sharing it stays with you forever. He guaranteed this method (sharing) will bold your experience in you. Ofcourse he explained that's from his personal experience. He said when we share the experience becomes more concrete in us. He gave examples, right after any program, everyone will be in the high mood, normally everyone gets a chance to share their experience. By sharing not only we keep reminding ourselves the highest state that we have experienced; there's always a chance we can be an inspiration to others. (Actually it was really great sharing and answers but only this much I remember for now. Of course it was also mentioned about the gratitude feeling that people will have towards you, if you happen to be the bridge, connecting them with the Master).
2) Sanyas is it needed for Enlightenment? One of the answer that I remember, Sanyas surely helps the process /path to be enlightened.
3) One thing was described about Swamiji in the 53 days was Swamiji's innocence. Because of the innocence Swamiji is so compassion. When Bhakta Swami was sharing his experience being in the same physical space with the Master (53 days in the prison), as though I could experience the truth he was sharing....Inocence of Swamiji that he experienced.
Someone asked Swami Sachit if he ever felt why he was not there in Bhakta's place to take care of Swamiji; Sachit answered, he thinks there couldn't be a better person than Bhakta to be there with the Swami at that moment.
Inner Healing with four senior Swamis. Many issues were addressed, stories shared, questions answered. It was held in Bidadi ashram yesterday. Originally planned for an hour but it was too much fun & open sharing, it went on almost for 2 hours.
Some questions I remember, why sharing your experience is given so much importance?, is sanyas needed for enlightenment?, 53 days in the prison with Swamiji what is one highlight or something you would say? (I forgot the exact question, but something close to this).
1) Sharing (this was referred to sharing through Healing Towers or facebook or share it with family and friends). Every sanyasis shared their view but one that I still remember is by sharing it stays with you forever. He guaranteed this method (sharing) will bold your experience in you. Ofcourse he explained that's from his personal experience. He said when we share the experience becomes more concrete in us. He gave examples, right after any program, everyone will be in the high mood, normally everyone gets a chance to share their experience. By sharing not only we keep reminding ourselves the highest state that we have experienced; there's always a chance we can be an inspiration to others. (Actually it was really great sharing and answers but only this much I remember for now. Of course it was also mentioned about the gratitude feeling that people will have towards you, if you happen to be the bridge, connecting them with the Master).
2) Sanyas is it needed for Enlightenment? One of the answer that I remember, Sanyas surely helps the process /path to be enlightened.
3) One thing was described about Swamiji in the 53 days was Swamiji's innocence. Because of the innocence Swamiji is so compassion. When Bhakta Swami was sharing his experience being in the same physical space with the Master (53 days in the prison), as though I could experience the truth he was sharing....Inocence of Swamiji that he experienced.
Someone asked Swami Sachit if he ever felt why he was not there in Bhakta's place to take care of Swamiji; Sachit answered, he thinks there couldn't be a better person than Bhakta to be there with the Swami at that moment.
Monday, September 27, 2010
My Favorite Quotes from Swamiji's teachings:
1) Whenever you express love you become a channel for healing energy to flow.
2) Only when you feel responsible for all that is happening around you, you become a leader.
3)There can be no logic about god, there can only be love.
4) Expectation is the first enemy of love.
5) Destiny is how you choose to respond to every situation life presents to you.
6) Constantly trying to suck energy from others is what I call 'attention need'.
7) Real love simply liberates. It gives freedom to you and the other person.
8) With Sanyas, you will continue to do what you are doing but in much better way.
9) Any task done with the energy of inspiration always gives good results.
10) Worry is created out ignorance, and sustained by ego.
11)Management is not about managing. It is about living by example.
12) Your life is powerful enough to make whatever you want as reality.
13) Acceptance of fear dissolves the fear.
14) Your intensity will increase when your actions starts falling in alignment with your intentions.
15) Trust even when you are exploited.
16) 90% of your worries never materialize.
17) Nobody can hurt you unless you permit, nobody can help you unless you permit.
18) All your negativity has one power, your faith in it.
19) Giving love and attention to others is the only solution for your attention-need.
20) Coming closer to Master is the path to becoming Master.
21) Master waits many lives for you. But you have to say 'YES'
Saturday, September 25, 2010
Master the Cosmic Glory: - Healed my anger, hatred and negative thinking of...
Master the Cosmic Glory: - Healed my anger, hatred and negative thinking of...: "- Healed my anger, hatred and negative thinking of our Hindu tradition. Especially being a woman, I use to think in Hinduism discriminate wo..."
continued.. - Healed my anger, hatred and negative thinking of our Hindu tradition. Especially being a woman, I use to think in Hinduism discriminate woman. Only with Swami's teachings, I understood women are treated as Divine.
He is one being who have given me a chance to do temple seva, by not judging me. Being a woman born and brought up in Malaysia (Islamic Country), not having a single knowledge about the vedic tradition, not to mention not from a 'priest' caste, oh...well being a woman itself we will not get a chance to do any major service in the temple (as in the general Indian society) ......not to mention so many reasons, nobody will give me a chance like Swami did. Even though He had to face the criticism from the society to put me in charge for The Vedic Temple, but for the sake of healing even one person, He is ready to take the risk. This actually broke my conditioning about woman in Vedic or overall Hinduism. Now, I have a complete shift about Hinduism. Women are treated Divinely. I am telling from 1st hand experience....
I also use to have fear of height (not acrophobia though), I can never stand on high ladders. But one day I realise standing on a 10' height ladder, on top, with saree on....wow! what happen? I was helping to put the crown for 'Lord Venkathewasra' (a 10' height deity in LA Vedic Temple, in Montclair now but this incident happened in Duarte; before moving to Montclair). The moment I realize, " hey I might fall down " the usual fear. It's too late. First of all I was holding something very precious -- venkatheswara's crown, almost done with the alankar (decoration), so no way I'm going to mess that, then it's been many times I have been helping for this in the past, nothing happened so I just stood still finish the work. Here you go....now out of that fear or engram. It may seem simple, but only if you have experience you understand, it's not easy to come out of these type of conditioning. Really....
So many other things, example; not knowing how to chant. Come out of that low self-esteem and judgement. When I could chant and do rituals, (a person, base on the societie's requirement, rarely people will take the risk to put people like me to do rituals and manage a large temple, even I, if there's so call interview without Swami's teaching, will Never Ever consider people with my background will be qualified or accepted by the society to take the temple management and ritual responsibility). Since now Swami has given me a chance, taking the risk and critism from the public, I am very convince, anybody can be helped, not to worry about so called societal moral values. Never Ever judge someone base on the knowledge we have. It's difficult for me to put in words. I am willing to share if you are interested. May be I can call..... :) email me if you are interested....how's that?!
Really I can go on list things 'how I've been helped in many ways' by doing service under Swami. I find it difficult to put it in simple and short sentences.
When I said Swami, I am referring any enlightened being. I just happened to be connected to Swami and His teaching. I know with Swamiji (all enlightened beings)are here to help us, there's nothing we can do to help them. They have attain the ultimate. Everything we think we are doing for them is actually only to help ourselves. Again of course this is from my life experience.
He is one being who have given me a chance to do temple seva, by not judging me. Being a woman born and brought up in Malaysia (Islamic Country), not having a single knowledge about the vedic tradition, not to mention not from a 'priest' caste, oh...well being a woman itself we will not get a chance to do any major service in the temple (as in the general Indian society) ......not to mention so many reasons, nobody will give me a chance like Swami did. Even though He had to face the criticism from the society to put me in charge for The Vedic Temple, but for the sake of healing even one person, He is ready to take the risk. This actually broke my conditioning about woman in Vedic or overall Hinduism. Now, I have a complete shift about Hinduism. Women are treated Divinely. I am telling from 1st hand experience....
I also use to have fear of height (not acrophobia though), I can never stand on high ladders. But one day I realise standing on a 10' height ladder, on top, with saree on....wow! what happen? I was helping to put the crown for 'Lord Venkathewasra' (a 10' height deity in LA Vedic Temple, in Montclair now but this incident happened in Duarte; before moving to Montclair). The moment I realize, " hey I might fall down " the usual fear. It's too late. First of all I was holding something very precious -- venkatheswara's crown, almost done with the alankar (decoration), so no way I'm going to mess that, then it's been many times I have been helping for this in the past, nothing happened so I just stood still finish the work. Here you go....now out of that fear or engram. It may seem simple, but only if you have experience you understand, it's not easy to come out of these type of conditioning. Really....
So many other things, example; not knowing how to chant. Come out of that low self-esteem and judgement. When I could chant and do rituals, (a person, base on the societie's requirement, rarely people will take the risk to put people like me to do rituals and manage a large temple, even I, if there's so call interview without Swami's teaching, will Never Ever consider people with my background will be qualified or accepted by the society to take the temple management and ritual responsibility). Since now Swami has given me a chance, taking the risk and critism from the public, I am very convince, anybody can be helped, not to worry about so called societal moral values. Never Ever judge someone base on the knowledge we have. It's difficult for me to put in words. I am willing to share if you are interested. May be I can call..... :) email me if you are interested....how's that?!
Really I can go on list things 'how I've been helped in many ways' by doing service under Swami. I find it difficult to put it in simple and short sentences.
When I said Swami, I am referring any enlightened being. I just happened to be connected to Swami and His teaching. I know with Swamiji (all enlightened beings)are here to help us, there's nothing we can do to help them. They have attain the ultimate. Everything we think we are doing for them is actually only to help ourselves. Again of course this is from my life experience.
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Seva in the Enlightened Masters' Space
Sept. 23, 2010 (Bidadi)
Nithyanandam,
I thought today I will share my personal experience.
I truly hated Hindu or temple rituals. God....really, I never appreciated it. This big... big rituals, always felt it's a waste of time and material. Worse still, never understood a single chanting or the rituals, ....well, it was a Waste. Really.
Only when I started doing seva (volunteering service) I had a breakthrough and mental shift. Huge Shift!!!
will continue......
Nithyanandam,
I thought today I will share my personal experience.
I truly hated Hindu or temple rituals. God....really, I never appreciated it. This big... big rituals, always felt it's a waste of time and material. Worse still, never understood a single chanting or the rituals, ....well, it was a Waste. Really.
Only when I started doing seva (volunteering service) I had a breakthrough and mental shift. Huge Shift!!!
will continue......
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Radiating inner & outer Peace!
Sept.21, 2010 (Bidadi) International Peace Day.
Today's message is so lovely. Personally perfect message for me.
Real peace is completely being established in Compassion in the internal world and tremendous Courage to face the external world. When we have real peace, our presence / existence heals the world.
Swami stressed the point: Time is a thread made out of Conscious Cotton. The supply of conscious cotton is eternal and inexhaustible. Then He explained, when we are clear time is a conscious thread, then will have the knowledge, the science of taking one more body.
Swami related this wisdom, with the scandal incident. So much threat to His life. However the fear did not touch His being (my own words) because He knows the Science of taking one more body.
Yesterday, I had such a relaxxxed day. Spend time cleaning the apartment. Took a nap, had nice Big dinner, and went to bed early too. However, I had chance to spend time with one of the senior sanyasi, he was sharing how we need to just simply stretch ourselves, even after everything that has said and done. It's our responsibility to serve the society and just be compassionate and go out of our way. I clearly remember the word stretch. He said we need to 'stretch' ourselves for others not just be in our comfort zone. Something like that.....
Then this morning Swami's message fit well with yesterday's conversation - establish in complete compassion and have tremendous courage. Great click for me!
Also in the message, another click, He said (again these are my words from what I remember- you know, we only hear what we want to hear) When the resources change, situations change, understanding the change and just flow with the resources available for you. Flow with the changing strategies! Ability to be able to go with the flow of the changing situations, that's what I call as real peace. It's your conscious decision you are here. Do not be threaten by anybody. At the most they can only delay!
There is no one life. You have eternal life. Just relax into this one truth.
Life is not worth of any suffering. Anything that disturbs peace, make it piece! piece! piece! :)
Just have the ability to change the strategy. Sometime it (the strategy, people, things, place, anthing) was important but does not have the importance now. Understanding to flow. They are liberated people. Have the fluidity!
People who are flying with me, they are the ultimate stable people. Living in the utter insecurity is enlightenment.
Of course, I have heard this type of messages before but today it 'hit' me and it's a great click. I was in the Sarwa Darshan line, and got blessings from Swamiji this morning. Felt really good and light. Beautiful feeling.
Thanks to everyone who are sending nice messages to me. Appreciate it very much. Thank you again....
Today's message is so lovely. Personally perfect message for me.
Real peace is completely being established in Compassion in the internal world and tremendous Courage to face the external world. When we have real peace, our presence / existence heals the world.
Swami stressed the point: Time is a thread made out of Conscious Cotton. The supply of conscious cotton is eternal and inexhaustible. Then He explained, when we are clear time is a conscious thread, then will have the knowledge, the science of taking one more body.
Swami related this wisdom, with the scandal incident. So much threat to His life. However the fear did not touch His being (my own words) because He knows the Science of taking one more body.
Yesterday, I had such a relaxxxed day. Spend time cleaning the apartment. Took a nap, had nice Big dinner, and went to bed early too. However, I had chance to spend time with one of the senior sanyasi, he was sharing how we need to just simply stretch ourselves, even after everything that has said and done. It's our responsibility to serve the society and just be compassionate and go out of our way. I clearly remember the word stretch. He said we need to 'stretch' ourselves for others not just be in our comfort zone. Something like that.....
Then this morning Swami's message fit well with yesterday's conversation - establish in complete compassion and have tremendous courage. Great click for me!
Also in the message, another click, He said (again these are my words from what I remember- you know, we only hear what we want to hear) When the resources change, situations change, understanding the change and just flow with the resources available for you. Flow with the changing strategies! Ability to be able to go with the flow of the changing situations, that's what I call as real peace. It's your conscious decision you are here. Do not be threaten by anybody. At the most they can only delay!
There is no one life. You have eternal life. Just relax into this one truth.
Life is not worth of any suffering. Anything that disturbs peace, make it piece! piece! piece! :)
Just have the ability to change the strategy. Sometime it (the strategy, people, things, place, anthing) was important but does not have the importance now. Understanding to flow. They are liberated people. Have the fluidity!
People who are flying with me, they are the ultimate stable people. Living in the utter insecurity is enlightenment.
Of course, I have heard this type of messages before but today it 'hit' me and it's a great click. I was in the Sarwa Darshan line, and got blessings from Swamiji this morning. Felt really good and light. Beautiful feeling.
Thanks to everyone who are sending nice messages to me. Appreciate it very much. Thank you again....
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